Uni finishes in a fit of Corona-tinged ignominy…

This is what I wrote a couple of days ago, before the proverbial s*** hit the fan…

And that, senhores e senhoras, is pretty much that. 

Every single one of the 6 years here at the University of Bristol; done just like that, vanished in a fit of Corona-tinged ignominy.  

Admittedly these years have been dragged out a fair amount – by virtue of my seeming refusal to leave the cocoon of student life; I have been here for a couple more years than I should have been…(“make that uni dream live on in perpetuity, I dare you!”) but the fact remains that this is a shockingly abject end to what is a large part of one’s formative years growing up. It is a downright meek and ignominious ending to the ‘uni’ chapter; to what would in normal times be cause for all the celebration, jubilation (and if we’re lucky, fornication!) in the world. 

But for reasons known only unto ‘the Corona lords’ (oh if only there was somebody we could blame for this sh**show) suddenly much of the inhabited world either have Coronavirus, are ‘self-quarantining’ to try and avoid getting Coronavirus, or are living apprehensively in what is most likely the run up to getting Coronavirus. 

“We’ve been Corona-ed”, I think you could put it, and not that anybody saw this coming, but the University of Bristol has become yet another case of collateral damage for the spread of this strange new beast that has suddenly gripped vast swathes of the world. What began in a single pet shop in a single town in China is suddenly affecting 70% of the world; and if anything else, this shows you the downsides to the world being so interconnected. “The slings and arrows of a truly globalized world” could be the title for the thesis of a geography degree, but that doesn’t make it any less true or relevant. As we have said before this is tragically veracious right now; in this the era of 2020’s Black Death; with new cases increasing worldwide almost by the hour.

On a side (and perhaps slightly less ominous) note; can we all just please spare a thought for the marketing department of the much-loved beer Corona, who will be living an absolute and utterly unprecedented nightmare right now. Still one of the most vastly popular beers on the world market, (and the most popular imported beer in the US by about a Route-66-length country mile) the marketing department at Corona must be wondering what on earth the chances are that the new scourge of the world would be called precisely the same thing as their beloved beer.

“Hijo de puta de Coronavirus!”

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Above is what I wrote whilst all of this was still a fairly distant and far-fetched worry…

Oh don’t we wish it still was; at the very moment that more and more dominoes fall and more and more citizens worldwide become infected with Covid-19.

This current situation becomes more worrying at breakneck speed, with almost hourly news updates of the worsening situation with which the world does battle.

In UK terms, we had the youngest reported death nationwide yesterday – a man in his 40s contracted the virus and died.

It is due to cases like this that the government is considering imposing a city-wide quarantine on the city of London this weekend.

(needless to say stay clean and safe everyone)